Well, this is inconvenient
When he left, sex was the furthest thing from my mind. My head was too fogged with tears and recriminations and hurt and confusion and pain to even consider sex. I wanted to curve in, fetal, covering my heart that seemed to be seeping from my chest.
But now? Holy lord, I’m going to slide off my chair. I. Want. Him. Not just sex. Him. Now. Now, now, now. In a feral, consuming, head banging kind of way. I think about his mouth, and his hair, and his hands, and his eyes, and his cock, and his shoulders and I just ache, want, need.
This is not going to work. It’s been two and a half weeks. For those of you keeping track at home, that’s not as long as we’ve been “apart.” When he came back to get his stuff and it was all sweeping and dramatic and emotional? Yeah.
And now I miss him and want to touch him and want to run my eyes all along the length of him and I can’t.
He may come to town for a visit this weekend, and if he does I won’t resist. I don’t even want to. I don’t even care that it might twist my heart all up with longing even more than it is now. I don’t even care that we don’t know what we’re doing, that we don’t know where we’re going. I don’t want logic or reason or the right thing. I just want him, him, him.
The title says it all.
Have the T-shirt’s last blog post..The Tale of the Tape
I don’t blame you one bit.
NATUI’s last blog post..Death Needs A New Hobby
i have never wanted anyone that much.
mary’s last blog post.."God Loves Rock and Roll" by Lionel Goldbart
@mary
I did. We ended up married happily for a year and unhappily for 8 more. The three since the divorce have been a pleasure, for me anyway.
Good luck Gypsy.
I don’t have a piece of good advice for you. I was always rubbish at these quasi-relationship periods. Hope you get what you need. Whatever that may be.
A Free Man’s last blog post..Beachcomber
I would like to say stand firm and wait until he figures his shit out before you let him back “in” but I know how hard that is when you miss a person and the space they occupied in your life. When I was little right after my parents divorced,my dad picked my mom and I up to take me to a baton twirling gig thing I had so they could both be there(I was about 7) afterward when we went home he hung out while I went to play outside and I came back to the house to get something and caught my parents post flagrante delicto,nothing nasty just my dad putting his pants back on. I remember even then knowing what was going on and being irritated, why can’t they make up their mind I thought. Now that I’ve built a life with my husband, I can see how even when things are bad or broken or maybe even over, you can still miss the shit out of a person.
chris/formerlyfun’s last blog post..Child Abuse
That sucks. Truly.
Finn’s last blog post..Character Study
T-Shirt: I thought so. Sigh.
NATUI: Good. Me, neither.
Mary: It’s wonderful, really. Well, when it’s not terrible.
Mare: We had almost 12 happy years, give or take some rough times along the way. And never in those 12 years have I stopped wanting him.
Chris: Me, too.
Formerly Fun: I’m fairly sure this is par for the course, really. I mean, we still love each other, the sex was always fantastic, we still want each other… hard to resist that pull, even when things are less than perfect.
Finn: It does and it doesn’t. It’s complicated.
Gypsy’s last blog post..Well, this is inconvenient
Oh my, do I get this. I mean I’ve been there, in that place where you are, and you just don’t give a shit how bad it’s going to fuck you up in your head, you just want it again.
gwen jackson’s last blog post..The Bridge
Do it. Like rabbits.
And just deal with whatever comes. (Pardon the pun.) Either way, you’ll be OK.
Coal Miner’s Granddaughter’s last blog post..My Mom is Divine 69!
Mare: We had almost 12 happy years, give or take some rough times along the way. And never in those 12 years have I stopped wanting him.
Gypsy? My heart aches for you. Be well.
well, crap.
flutter’s last blog post..Feeling super girly
I’ve followed you along for years because you and I are a lot alike. I’ve been with my man for years like you and still I am single.
I have to admit, I am mad at Lancelot and it is time that you let him go. He will continue to do this to you as long as you let him. Show him that you can go on without him and maybe he will get his shit together. It isn’t fair and life does go on.
Sorry.
Carrie’s last blog post..All better…
Gwen: I’m pretty sure I’ll always want him, regardless of my stupid head.
CMGD: I think I will. Although he wasn’t able to come down this weekend, which might have been for the best.
Flutter: My thoughts exactly.
Carrie: It’s ok. I’m pretty angry, too, though I don’t write about that part of my feelings very much. As for him knowing I can go on without him, that’s not really an issue. He knows very well that I can and have and will. In fact, he’s pretty sure I’ll be better off without him.
Gypsy’s last blog post..Well, this is inconvenient
I wouldn´t be able to resist it. Just wouldn´t. Just not that strong.
bluestreak’s last blog post..A Blue Goodbye
Yeah, I say go for it too. It is REALLY hard when you miss the cock.
I’m not even going into how long it’s been, because I might start to cry.
rassles’s last blog post..P4C7: Ten Drunks Are Way Easier To Manage Than Forty