All by myself
Lancelot comes home today.
I. Am. Psyched.
Being apart this week has been difficult, but kind of wonderful, too. I miss him. I haven’t slept well. I haven’t been able to talk to him much (although we’re burning up the text messages). I’ve had to feed the dogs every night (we usually switch off). And I’ve just been so lonesome for his company, for his voice, for his arms.
But.
I tend to get wrapped up in him. I always have. He fascinates me, enthralls me, amuses me. I like to look at him, be around him. Part of that is just my nature — I love completely, with abandon, desperately. And part of that is just us — he’s my partner, my best friend, my support system, my love.
All this means that I am often inclined to let the world go to hell in favor of him. Which is great for romance novels, but not so great for social lives, careers, personal development, or independence.
So being apart this week has served to remind me of a time when I was on my own, when I survived just fine, thanks, when I entertained myself and kept busy and laughed and felt whole all on my own. And I needed that kind of desperately. I hope that in the coming weeks, my alone time will be even more productive, more self-fulfilling.
Of course, this separation has also meant sweet, loving text messages: Good morning beautiful, I miss you so, I can’t wait to see you, Hello sweetie, Goodnight princess, Kisses.
And my favorite:
I love you.
Do you love me?
Please, please!
(I want to hold you.)
Yes, we are extremely cheesy.
He’ll be home this evening and I’m fidgety with anticipation. It’s only been five days, but he’ll turn around and do it all again on Sunday. And I’ll be desperate without him, but also just fine.
Everything happens for a reason… you needed to learn to do without him and he needed a job. And there it was: training out of town!
Have a wonderful weekend and enjoy each other. xoxo
Finn’s last blog post..But Will It Keep Me Warm On A Cold Winter’s Night?
“being apart this week has served to remind me of a time when I was on my own, when I survived just fine, thanks, when I entertained myself and kept busy and laughed and felt whole all on my own.”
This is it – this is the deeper cosmic reason for this separation. We can so wrapped up in another person that we forget just how good we are, just as we are.
I am glad he’s coming home though – man, I envy you the separation/coming home sex – just thinking of it is a bit scorchy!! (:P)
we_be_toys’s last blog post..Ludicrous Beauty
Im glad your love is coming home to you. Have a fabulous weekend!
Chanda’s last blog post..Dirt Therapy
I’m so glad that lance is on his way home tonight.
trouble’s last blog post..getting one’s priorities straight
[insert deep contented sigh here. please.]
Maggie, dammit’s last blog post..healing.
Cheesy love is makes for the best love. :p
Maria’s last blog post..Marriage is Overrated.
I always read blogs and drink coffee on Sunday mornings. I ended up here even though I KNEW you wouldn’t post over the weekend! I hope you’ve had a wonderful time with your guy.
Don’t be too hard on yourself. I’m married, and we still do the cheesy texting thing even though he’ll be home at the end of the day!